Thursday, July 17, 2008

Everyone's A Critic

I admit, I was one once too. Prior to having my own children you would find me looking at parents in the mall or park, or grocery store. I had all sorts of insights to provide them, if only they would ask. "They must give him a full can of soda each morning, how could anyone have that much energy?" is what I thought of some kids. "Don't reward him for that behavior", I would think to another. "Who runs the show at that house?" I would wonder to another.

Since becoming a parent, my outlook has changed. I empathize more than criticize. I realize they all have their moments, just like adults. We have good days and bad, and sometimes just need to eat and take a nap. Sometimes we just need alone time, or some time with Daddy.

The boys and I went grocery shopping today. I normally look forward to this outing with them. Little Man helps pick out items and The Babe helps put them in the cart. Today was no exception, all was going as planned, until The Babe saw the yogurt!

The Babe, being all of 20 months, still hasn't found all of his words. When he wants something he usually signs and says the word "more". Today he broke my heart while it melted when he added the word please and used the sign. He knows how to work it.

I have been known to let the boys eat while we shop. Who doesn't dip into the grapes, or open a box of trail mix while meandering down the aisles deciding what to have for the next meal, which is usually within the hour. Since yogurt is not on my approved list of items to eat while shipping, I tried to divert The Babe's attention to string cheese. "Do you think I am dumb woman?" is what the look that he gave me said.

A woman in her grandmother years was in the aisle with us and started to giggle. I mistakenly took this giggle as one of empathy but I was wrong. I soon heard her say "I'm glad those aren't my children". Although I too, was happy they were not her children, I laughed and said something to the effect of "You would think I didn't feed them". We parted ways. The three of us and the woman. Not me and the boys.

We see the woman again a few aisles later. The Babe had calmed down but the annoying attention he is getting from the woman makes him a little irritated and begins to whine. He is, after all, hungry and I did not give into to his yogurt whine so she is just a reminder of this fact. We part ways again.

The Babe calms down with some string cheese and we check out. Little Man helps place things on the counter while The Babe flirts with the checker. All is well again. We head to the in-store Starbucks after Little Man informs me we have been very good at the store and Mommy deserves a White Chocolate Mocha. I kid you not, he said that. He also added that he would like some milk and a donut. He orders for us; again, I kid you not. Tall nonfat WC Mocha for Mommy and too Chocolate milks for the boys. Here she is again. This time she notes the milks and says "Looks like you won this one buddy", she says while looking at The Babe. "Mommy shouldn't reward you for that kind of behavior". I love it when people talk to me through my kids.

In unusual form, I looked at her and said "It is too bad we have to be parents to be grandparents isn't it, being a grandparent is so much easier".


Honeybell said...

Yes. Milk is totally a reward. My kids are kept on a strict stale bread and water diet until they do something to earn dairy products. Like steam clean the carpets.

Grrr. Good for you, politely putting her in her place.

Stacey @Real World Mom said...

Ooh! Love it!! And, yes, I have met that woman. She's a b*t*h! Sounds like you handled her very well! Have a great weekend! :-)

Bottles Barbies & Boys said...

She really must get around, I too have met her!
I had my children to throw cans of food in her direction, by accident you know. ;)

Anonymous said...

You go girl!!!!
Aunt Tammy better not ever run into that lady... we both know I could take her.

Heydt Wylie Family said...

You know you told me this story on the phone yesterday and I am still pissed off for you!

I think you handled it with grace and style.

I would of just told her to F.O. and poked her in the eye. OK maybe not, but I would of been thinking it.

Putz said...

grandparenting is easier, you got to be kidding, up at sky line all 5 said mine, mine, mine, and i hope i never have to hear that word again, also your tindency to mother other's children in grocery store is why you blog ...peolpe need to hear you through that medium, my daughter karen who is just like you right down to your cute bellybuttons need to hear your stories for her two

Half-Past Kissin' Time said...

Glad she's not their grandma! What a crank!

Bee Repartee said...

Good retort and so graceful.

You know how most people say, "I wish I would have said..."

I think, "I wish I hadn't said that."

Although, I might have just said directly to my son (and with a smile!), "Mommy doesn't value judgmental people, does she?"

See what I mean?

Deb said...

Good for you! How incredibly rude of her.

Childless people grate on me whenever they think they have the answers. I can't begin to tell you the conversations I've had recently about my pregnancy or my toddler with complete strangers! Whenever they say something asinine, my first question is, "Do you have kids?"

Tranny Head said...

Eww! You're obviously much nicer than I am - I would have been all over that like white on rice ... and not in a rather polite and restrained comment!

piper of love said...

ps. I LOVE YOUR NEW BLOG LOOK!! wit woo!

Anonymous said...

Great story, Nice comment back. Good for you. People like that make me mad.

Thanks for joining Drop On Top, your on the list.

Dianne said...

OMG.. that was a brilliant come back :) Wish I'd thought of that! But, I'll be sure to remember it next time I run into "HER" at the grocery store haha.

Xbox4NappyRash said...

the cheeky mare.

I like the new look much better by the way.

Our Crooked Tree said...

Hey all,

Thanks for coming by! Normally I would have thought of my come back as I was walking to the car but she gave me enough time between each visit to think about her!

Piper and X: glad you like the new look; thanks for noticing!

crazed1969 said...

Isn't it amazing how everyone else's kids behave so much better than yours? I'm guessing that those people, if they did have kids, must have locked their kids up in the closet and never took them anywhere. It's the only explanation I can think up.

Kimmylyn said...

Did you accidently run over her foot too?? (Oh sorry that was just me thinking that is what you should have done..hahaha)

Janet Giacoma said...

Everyone has their own style, as long as it really works :)

Loving your blog! said...


and i think nobody should be allowed to write a parenting book if they have never had at least one kid. i don't care how much education and training they have had. they should have to also have had at least one kid to get to write a book on it.

i remember thinking different things, too, about wild kids before we had ours. ours are 16 and almost 18 now. big eye opener!

hey, i have had fun popping around and reading a bunch of your posts today. you're funny. enjoying your blog and your outlook, beany :)