You Can't Handle The Truth

Everyone has trying times. We all experience loss in one form or another. These events can happen to us one at a time like a slow leak or they can come at us all at once like a roof caving in. The great thing about being human is that we can all empathize with each other during strife and triumph. Not everyone handles success well. I have met a few people that actually sabotage their own success because they do not feel they deserve it. Fortunately I am not one of those people, I deserve every bit of it! Not everyone handles stress well. On the other hand, some of us shine brighter than ever when they are in a pressure cooker.

Problems are not really the problem. Coping is the problem. Not everyone is equipped with the necessary tools to get through the times that challenge them. I used to be the type of person that, under stress, would withdrawal from others. My theory was “why do I want to bother others with this”, this is my deal. What I have learned over the last few years is that these are the times I need to reach out even more than usual. Of course I am selective to whom I reach out, not everyone can handle the truth about other’s vulnerabilities.

After one particular year of growth, I had many friends say to me they could not imagine how I got through it. A divorce, the death of my mom, job loss, and a whole lot of heartache can test the strongest among us. Although I understood what they meant, I think what they should have said was “How did you get through it”.

For those that cannot tell the difference between the statement and the question, let me elaborate. The statement focuses on the situation. The question focuses on the person. I admit I am guilty of this too. I want to show my compassion but I do not want to bring up a sore subject. Are we all so self absorbed we do not realize there is a difference? Is it that no one wants to hear it? Are we afraid of what we will hear? Do we think what we hear will make us look at ourselves in a way we may not like?

No man is an island. If we would stop and listen to others, we might learn something about them, and maybe ourselves.

What Genitals and Religion Have in Common

Stick with me here folks.  I will hopefully make sense soon enough.

My parents taught me a lot of things.  Most of you have heard similar statements from your parents including, but not limited to:

• Don't point.


• Don't talk with your mouth full.


• Cloth shoes are for evening wear.


• The olive in a martini DOES count as a veggie serving.


• If you don't have something nice to say, keep your mouth shut.


• You get what you give.

Although my parents divorced when I was eight years old, they agreed on one thing.  Don't force others to see things your way.  Your way is not the only way.  This did backfire on them as I got older, when I could use the argument against them.  At that point, their work was done.  They had taught me to think for myself and allow others to do the same thing.

You might be asking yourself at this point, "Hey Red, what does this have to do with my God or my junk?".  Patience is a virtue my one lonely reader.  I am getting there.

As my mother's health declined over the last couple of years, I noticed her relationship with her God got stronger than ever.  My mother was a big believer in the power of prayer and believed her God answered every prayer.  Some will say those  fighting terminal illnesses tend to gravitate towards religion.  They need something, anything, in which they can believe.  I, on the other hand believe my mother already had a strong faith.  It was in this time of need that she was able to find solace in her faith.  She never ran around waving a self righteous flag.  She didn't have to, her God knew her heart.

I grew up near the church.  I don't mean it was down the street.  I mean that I asked Jesus to be my Lord and Savior a long time ago. I was baptized and forgiven for my sins.  We did not attend church every Sunday and Wednesday though.  I did not wear my faith on my shoulder.  My faith is something I consider to be very personal and private.  It is mine.  The other reason for my privacy with my faith is, frankly I did not want to be grouped with some of the zealots I have met on the road to redemption.  Most so-called Christians I have met in all my 34 years are the most judgmental and unforgiving souls I have ever met.  I found it ironic that the religion founded on forgiveness seems to be the least.  These people know a different God than I do.

My step-dad was a deacon in his church for years.  I listen to his stories about his time serving God in this capacity and I hear the cynicism in his voice.  He too, had a similar viewpoint as I do.  Too bad.  The church lost another good follower. His faith is still strong.  He and my mom walked together and shared their faith.  Funny thing though, I never saw him waving a flag either.

My father is a non-believer.  He was raised in a large Catholic  family and has his reasons for his viewpoint.  I don't try to convince him of my way and he gives me the same respect.  He does not mock the cross I wear around my neck and I do not tell him he is going to hell.  On the contrary, one day when our time comes, he will save me a seat in heaven and be the first to pass me a Schlafly.

I took the boys to church last Sunday.  No, I don't go every Sunday and that does not make me less of a Christian than those that do.  Hell, going to church makes you as much of a Christina as hanging out in the garage makes you a car. While are church, the boys enjoyed children's church while I listened to a sermon that could not have been timed more appropriatly.  Why does it turn out that when I finally show up, I hear exactly what I need to hear?  Do I make the sermon work for me or is God doin his job?  I will go with the latter...might make me go again.  I will continue to take the boys to church on occasion and educate them on all religions, not just Christianity.  Information is power and my boys will make their own diecisions.

Oh, and I will let them wear jeans when we go.  I am such a heathen.

You might still be wondering about your junk. Your religion is like your genitalia.  Don't shove either down anyone's throats please.  The world will be a much better place.

Wordless Wednesday ~ Partners In Crime

Almost Wordless Wednesday

This is Jeena. Jeena is a HUGE Star Wars fan. Thanks to my friend Jim over at The Busy Dad Blog, I am now Jeena's favorite person. Seems I won a contest over at Jim's blog that made Jeena the proud owner of the ENTIRE Star Wars bobble head collection. May the force be with you Jeena.

Almost Wordless Wednesday

This is Jeena. Jeena is a HUGE Star Wars fan. Thanks to my friend Jim over at The Busy Dad Blog, I am now Jeena's favorite person. Seems I won a contest over at Jim's blog that made Jeena the proud owner of the ENTIRE Star Wars bobble head collection. May the force be with you Jeena.

Almost Wordless Wednesday

This is Jeena. Jeena is a HUGE Star Wars fan. Thanks to my friend Jim over at The Busy Dad Blog, I am now Jeena's favorite person. Seems I won a contest over at Jim's blog that made Jeena the proud owner of the ENTIRE Star Wars bobble head collection. May the force be with you Jeena.

I Get By With A Little Help From My Friends

I have had writer's block lately. We have been really busy; trying to cram the last few days of summer in before it's actual end date has distracted me from my writing. Not only am I preoccupied, there really has been very little to motivate me to write. Until yesterday.

One of my oldest and dearest friends is a hair stylist. Funny thing about me and hubs; we have been good friends with all of our hairstylists. We have pondered which comes first; friend or hair. After all, you need to get in good with the folks that you trust with what may be your prized possession. While in college in SWMO before I met hubs, I worked as a receptionist for a salon. I became friends with a few of the stylists but when I moved to NC I lost touch with them. There was Kathy in KC. Brad and Kathy went way back. When I moved back to KC and met Brad, I was lucky enough to met my new hairstylist that quickly became my friend. There was Nikki in Florida. Nikki owned the house we bought in Florida. When we did the final walk through with her hubs, I asked what they did for a living. He worked for FedEx and Nikki was a stylist. Although Nikkie refused to come in her old home for at least six months, in fear of an emotional breakdown, I got to know her in the chair and we became fast friends. Now back in SWMO, I reunited with my one time friend/co-worker Jeena. Not only did I work with Jeena, but hubs went to high school with her and her hubs works at the fire department with my brother in law.

The reason I am taking you down hair lane is so you understand that these women are not just stylists; they are my friends. So it should come as no surprise to you that upon arriving at Jeena's house yesterday for my appointment, I entered her lower level salon addition and went upstairs to the kitchen to find her. The salon and house were silent when I got there so I had checked the book to make sure I had the day and time right. I noticed Jeena had lots of time on her book before me open and then after my appointment as well. I looked forward to a leisurely cut and blow dry and maybe time to talk with a friend I don't see enough. I walked to the kitchen thinking she may be making herself something to eat, as it was around the lunch hour.

As I said "hello", I heard a little giggle and saw my good friend appear from behind the wall that separates the kitchen and living room. I guess her fire man husband was not at the station that day. The beauty of moving her business to her home is she get to keep more of what she makes and she gets to spend more "time" with her family.

I giggled and asked if her hubs was home then I heard a high pitched "hello" from the other room. Although Jeena and I scurried to the salon, fire man later appeared a little glassy eyed and anxious for me to leave. Much to their dismay, Jeena's next client arrived early, even before I got out of the drive way.

I Get By With A Little Help From My Friends

I have had writer's block lately. We have been really busy; trying to cram the last few days of summer in before it's actual end date has distracted me from my writing. Not only am I preoccupied, there really has been very little to motivate me to write. Until yesterday.

One of my oldest and dearest friends is a hair stylist. Funny thing about me and hubs; we have been good friends with all of our hairstylists. We have pondered which comes first; friend or hair. After all, you need to get in good with the folks that you trust with what may be your prized possession. While in college in SWMO before I met hubs, I worked as a receptionist for a salon. I became friends with a few of the stylists but when I moved to NC I lost touch with them. There was Kathy in KC. Brad and Kathy went way back. When I moved back to KC and met Brad, I was lucky enough to met my new hairstylist that quickly became my friend. There was Nikki in Florida. Nikki owned the house we bought in Florida. When we did the final walk through with her hubs, I asked what they did for a living. He worked for FedEx and Nikki was a stylist. Although Nikkie refused to come in her old home for at least six months, in fear of an emotional breakdown, I got to know her in the chair and we became fast friends. Now back in SWMO, I reunited with my one time friend/co-worker Jeena. Not only did I work with Jeena, but hubs went to high school with her and her hubs works at the fire department with my brother in law.

The reason I am taking you down hair lane is so you understand that these women are not just stylists; they are my friends. So it should come as no surprise to you that upon arriving at Jeena's house yesterday for my appointment, I entered her lower level salon addition and went upstairs to the kitchen to find her. The salon and house were silent when I got there so I had checked the book to make sure I had the day and time right. I noticed Jeena had lots of time on her book before me open and then after my appointment as well. I looked forward to a leisurely cut and blow dry and maybe time to talk with a friend I don't see enough. I walked to the kitchen thinking she may be making herself something to eat, as it was around the lunch hour.

As I said "hello", I heard a little giggle and saw my good friend appear from behind the wall that separates the kitchen and living room. I guess her fire man husband was not at the station that day. The beauty of moving her business to her home is she get to keep more of what she makes and she gets to spend more "time" with her family.

I giggled and asked if her hubs was home then I heard a high pitched "hello" from the other room. Although Jeena and I scurried to the salon, fire man later appeared a little glassy eyed and anxious for me to leave. Much to their dismay, Jeena's next client arrived early, even before I got out of the drive way.

Anticipation

Yesterday my router went bad. Of course I didn't realize this until late in the day. I originally thought my connection was down due to our monsoon like weather this year. I called the Internet company and they said they had received a lot of calls form my area of town so a tech was on his way to investigate. Anticipation.

Normally when I put the boys down for their nap I end up falling asleep with G-Man. I do enjoy this time together as I know it won't last long, but when I get up, I realize I got nothing done that needed to get done. Yesterday was different. For some reason I was able to put him down and leave the room. He was so tired he didn't seem to mind either. What am I supposed to do with no Internet?

I emptied the dishwasher and rotated laundry. I put the clean laundry away, which is normally a four day task. I cleaned out closets, rearranged furniture, and prepared for a garage sale. I painted my toes. I read an on line instructional manual for a tool in which I was interested, but up until now, had no time to study. Most importantly, I edited a marketing presentation for a client that had been anticipating it's completion for a while. All while the boys slept.

Last night hubs rigged my access but I was not wireless and only one of us could be on at a time. Once he saw how productive I was yesterday he said he was going to have "scheduled maintenance" on a regular basis. He is funny.

Now it is Friday July 4th and I am anticipating the arrival of my friend Piper. I am happy I had the down time yesterday so I could prepare for her weekend with us. Piper and I have never met in "real life" and I want to make a good impression. Until now, she has been my "imaginary friend" as hubs says, and now our virtual and real worlds are colliding. What I show people on line may look different in real life (you will have to ask her after her trip). So in anticipation of our fab friend staying the weekend with us, I emptied the trash so she wouldn't have to smell soiled diapers in the bathrooms. I put up a couple air fresheners so she wouldn't be subjected to G-Man's new farting past time. I cleaned the sheets on the guest bed; after all it is G-Man's bed and who knows what is on those sheets.

Am I the only one that cleans BEFORE a party or guest arrives?

You should anticipate lots of fun pictures and details of our weekend with Piper! What could be better than two redheads, some PBR, and the river?

Anticipation

Yesterday my router went bad. Of course I didn't realize this until late in the day. I originally thought my connection was down due to our monsoon like weather this year. I called the Internet company and they said they had received a lot of calls form my area of town so a tech was on his way to investigate. Anticipation.

Normally when I put the boys down for their nap I end up falling asleep with G-Man. I do enjoy this time together as I know it won't last long, but when I get up, I realize I got nothing done that needed to get done. Yesterday was different. For some reason I was able to put him down and leave the room. He was so tired he didn't seem to mind either. What am I supposed to do with no Internet?

I emptied the dishwasher and rotated laundry. I put the clean laundry away, which is normally a four day task. I cleaned out closets, rearranged furniture, and prepared for a garage sale. I painted my toes. I read an on line instructional manual for a tool in which I was interested, but up until now, had no time to study. Most importantly, I edited a marketing presentation for a client that had been anticipating it's completion for a while. All while the boys slept.

Last night hubs rigged my access but I was not wireless and only one of us could be on at a time. Once he saw how productive I was yesterday he said he was going to have "scheduled maintenance" on a regular basis. He is funny.

Now it is Friday July 4th and I am anticipating the arrival of my friend Piper. I am happy I had the down time yesterday so I could prepare for her weekend with us. Piper and I have never met in "real life" and I want to make a good impression. Until now, she has been my "imaginary friend" as hubs says, and now our virtual and real worlds are colliding. What I show people on line may look different in real life (you will have to ask her after her trip). So in anticipation of our fab friend staying the weekend with us, I emptied the trash so she wouldn't have to smell soiled diapers in the bathrooms. I put up a couple air fresheners so she wouldn't be subjected to G-Man's new farting past time. I cleaned the sheets on the guest bed; after all it is G-Man's bed and who knows what is on those sheets.

Am I the only one that cleans BEFORE a party or guest arrives?

You should anticipate lots of fun pictures and details of our weekend with Piper! What could be better than two redheads, some PBR, and the river?

This may lead to thumb wrestling

Have you noticed all the great blog contests that are out there lately? Me too; yet I rarely enter them. I am either too lazy, miss the deadline, or don’t meet the requirements. If I do manage to enter I doubt I will win. I am such a victim; being brought down by the man. Yet, one man recently brightened my day when he e-mailed me to say I had won a contest! Yeah! “The Man” is Joeprah and I have been remiss in properly acknowledging and thanking him for my fabulous winnings. You see, a few weeks back my man Joe had a drawing for a great lot of books. This contest was so up my alley and Joe made it easy to enter and win. If the book topic didn’t suit my taste I know of someone that will enjoy each one. I am especially looking forward to reading the novel by country music’s fab duo Brooks and Dunn. Who knew they were writers...oh yeah.

So Joe is having another contest that I just had to enter. Joe is giving away a new camera and I need a replacement. The boys have decided that my old Sony is theirs for the taking. I am not all that upset; I like to see their perspective in pictures. Brad has a D70 which is way to fancy and big for me to throw in my bag to take with us on outings or have handy for a quick photo op. Cross your fingers that I win this one too!

In an attempt to be a little more like Joe, we made a video for him. It is certainly not up to his standards though (I do realize that brown nosing will not help me chances in this contest but I had to try). As I watched the video I realized how far apart I am from the boys. This is due to them fighting over the very camera I am trying to replace; I had to send them to separate corners of the couch. The end of the video will demonstrate my fab parenting skills. I kid you not, I am not acting. That is utter surprise and delight that they actually did it without provocation ON CAMERA!

Also note G-Man's new "puppy trick" (phrase stolen from my friend Kim). When his three year old brain is ripe for the picking and we should be teaching him Mandarin Chinese or Sanskrit, we are teaching him stupid movie lines.

The whole family loves ya Joe! Keep it up!

This may lead to thumb wrestling

Have you noticed all the great blog contests that are out there lately? Me too; yet I rarely enter them. I am either too lazy, miss the deadline, or don’t meet the requirements. If I do manage to enter I doubt I will win. I am such a victim; being brought down by the man. Yet, one man recently brightened my day when he e-mailed me to say I had won a contest! Yeah! “The Man” is Joeprah and I have been remiss in properly acknowledging and thanking him for my fabulous winnings. You see, a few weeks back my man Joe had a drawing for a great lot of books. This contest was so up my alley and Joe made it easy to enter and win. If the book topic didn’t suit my taste I know of someone that will enjoy each one. I am especially looking forward to reading the novel by country music’s fab duo Brooks and Dunn. Who knew they were writers...oh yeah.

So Joe is having another contest that I just had to enter. Joe is giving away a new camera and I need a replacement. The boys have decided that my old Sony is theirs for the taking. I am not all that upset; I like to see their perspective in pictures. Brad has a D70 which is way to fancy and big for me to throw in my bag to take with us on outings or have handy for a quick photo op. Cross your fingers that I win this one too!

In an attempt to be a little more like Joe, we made a video for him. It is certainly not up to his standards though (I do realize that brown nosing will not help me chances in this contest but I had to try). As I watched the video I realized how far apart I am from the boys. This is due to them fighting over the very camera I am trying to replace; I had to send them to separate corners of the couch. The end of the video will demonstrate my fab parenting skills. I kid you not, I am not acting. That is utter surprise and delight that they actually did it without provocation ON CAMERA!

Also note G-Man's new "puppy trick" (phrase stolen from my friend Kim). When his three year old brain is ripe for the picking and we should be teaching him Mandarin Chinese or Sanskrit, we are teaching him stupid movie lines.

The whole family loves ya Joe! Keep it up!

Wacky Wylie Wednesday

Wednesday we have a standing play date with the Wylies. Mom Wylie and I alternate who brings coffee to the other home. I like a non-fat white chocolate mocha without whip and Mom Wylie likes a one pump mocha. Although they did not sit accordingly in the photo, our kids stair step in age at 18 months, 21 months, 3 years, and 4 years.

It is funny what happens when you are around other parents and their kids. For instance; today, when Mom Wylie was graciously making all four kids lunch at her house, Little Man decides to add a request to the menu. Not only would he like a hot dog, he would like icing for dipping the hot dog. Normally, this would be funny and we would move on, maybe talk about a recent birthday party and the cake for reasoning. However, Mom Wylie has happened upon our home on more than one occasion when my kids are either eating cinnamon rolls with icing for breakfast, or the one morning we made pancakes and I allowed Little Man to have some left over cupcake icing for dipping. The boy likes to dip his food, what can I say.

So I have added a new food group to the pyramid. Icing. Preferably cream cheese icing. Cheese is good for you right?

If Mom Wylie only knew what her boy eats when she is not around at our house!

Check out the Heydt-Wylie Blog; Blue has a weekly wacky wardrobe entry that is too cute.

Wacky Wylie Wednesday

Wednesday we have a standing play date with the Wylies. Mom Wylie and I alternate who brings coffee to the other home. I like a non-fat white chocolate mocha without whip and Mom Wylie likes a one pump mocha. Although they did not sit accordingly in the photo, our kids stair step in age at 18 months, 21 months, 3 years, and 4 years.

It is funny what happens when you are around other parents and their kids. For instance; today, when Mom Wylie was graciously making all four kids lunch at her house, Little Man decides to add a request to the menu. Not only would he like a hot dog, he would like icing for dipping the hot dog. Normally, this would be funny and we would move on, maybe talk about a recent birthday party and the cake for reasoning. However, Mom Wylie has happened upon our home on more than one occasion when my kids are either eating cinnamon rolls with icing for breakfast, or the one morning we made pancakes and I allowed Little Man to have some left over cupcake icing for dipping. The boy likes to dip his food, what can I say.

So I have added a new food group to the pyramid. Icing. Preferably cream cheese icing. Cheese is good for you right?

If Mom Wylie only knew what her boy eats when she is not around at our house!

Check out the Heydt-Wylie Blog; Blue has a weekly wacky wardrobe entry that is too cute.